Monday, March 19, 2007

Little did she know....


Corpses have been popping up in some strange places lately. I want it made perfectly clear that this is not a trend in the direction of this commentary blog. And so, after this post, I promise to you, gentle readers, that I will not talk about strange corpse sightings for a while. Of course, being the Good Doctor that I am, I am free to break that promise if a really super juicy corpse-related story pops up again.

Also, I in no way advocate using Reuters as a primary news source. It's just one of the many RSS feeds that I check frequently. I just happen to like their comprehensive coverage of the ever expanding dilemma in America and abroad of corpse treatment.

The person in this article died just after takeoff. The article is poorly written and so it is difficult to discern exactly what happened. How was this man, apparently asleep in First Class not roused when the crew of the airplane were lugging a dead grandma down the aisle and then unceremoniously dumping her in the seat next to him, and then stuffing her in there with pillows so she wouldn't fall on the floor.

Whose decision was it to not just stuff granny in the bathroom and lock the door? Wouldn't that be better? Certainly not more dignified for the deceased, but definitely more tolerable to the poor bastard who woke up with a dead body next to him. Of course, there was the bereaved also on the plane. I mean, wow. This is absolutely amazing. There is literally nothing you can do when someone just up and dies on a plane in flight. Put yourself in the position of the stewardess or the captain that has to make the judgment call, "Uh...I don't know...maybe...strap granny to a chair and hope nobody notices. Put a pillow under her head, maybe people will think she's sleeping."

Sure, yeah, that will work. Imagine you're dozing there in your seat and the unthinkable happens: your neighbor, a complete stranger, rests his or her head on your shoulder in their sleep. Some people just deal with it and pretend it's not happening. Of course, there are those of us who will be like, "hey granny, um...I'm not comfortable with this... hello? Lady? You awake?...... um.... wake up...." You nudge her a few times, "Seriously, this isn't funny...." and then, "oh shit..." followed by you pushing the call button and then saying fuck this, "Stewardess!!! Um... I really think you should come over here..."

It's really just further proof that there are fewer and fewer real human tragedies in the world. And more and more comedies. Come on, admit it. You laughed.

3 comments:

Sharon said...

I admit it, I actually did chuckle at this!

Puuda Maggui said...

All this talk about death! Are you becoming Emo, Dr. K?

Dr Kuha said...

How can you say such a thing? I make light of death and unhappy things, not revel in them. Shame on you Puuda.